Friendship is a learning experience. You learn about other people’s lives, different upbringings, cultures, traditions and very importantly, personalities. As you grow as a person, friendships grow and in some cases, die off.
My mummy claims I don’t listen to her enough, but I do listen…to the important bits! Something she has always said is “you will only ever have 5 REAL friends in your life; the only 5 you will ever truly trust.” This is something that has always stuck with me when I’m feeling anxious about friendships or opening up to people. Over the past 10 years, I’ve watched friends come and go, friendship circles change and other friends lose friends because of silly things, however there have been a few that have stayed true. “Friends are the family we choose.”
Types of Friends
Friends you don’t see for a long time, but when you reunite nothing has changed and it feels like you’ve never been apart
In my case, this is my best friend, Helen. *Soppy alert* I don’t know how to describe my love for Helen as a best friend. We’ve been through some of the hardest times in our lives together, been by each other’s sides since secondary school…even if it wasn’t physically by the other’s side, we know we can call or text at any time. Helen is off living life to the full on the other side of the world. Sometimes we won’t text for a month or two, our only contact is tagging each other on memes on Facebook. That’s how I know she is safe and still remembers little old me back in Belfast.
Friends you don’t see for a long time and when you reunite you remember exactly why you haven’t seen them in ages
These aren’t great friends. Maybe it’s because you have both changed as people or began to drift apart. I find these friendships sad but this drift has obviously happened for a reason. If that friendship is meant to be, it will be! It could be the fact you can’t trust them completely, a clash in personalities or something as simple as moving on in life.
Friends from University
The friends you meet at university can be your friends for life. I’ve said it in previous blogs and forgive me for being a broken record; university is such a great opportunity to open yourself up to new friendships, new learning opportunities and in a way, a new lifestyle. Once uni is over you guarantee you will see each other, “we HAVE to get a night out organised”. It doesn’t happen. I love my uni friends so much and miss them dearly, however we all lead busy lives now and it genuinely is hard to find the time when everyone is available. But hey girls, if you’re reading this…drinks??
These friends won’t really relate to everyone, unless you have a blog. Some of the girls I have met through blogging are better friends to me than friends I’ve had for years. I know that at least three of the girls I have met through blogging will be friends for life; I can’t put into words how amazing they are! We know each other’s situations, the stress that comes with blogging when you are working a full time job. My queens!
You were friends at one point but things could have turned sour. You still see this person – not out of choice – but have to be civil because you’re trying to be a bigger person. I can think of one example, personally. They cause a lot of upset and anger in my life, yet there’s nothing I can do about it. My plan is to be successful and prove them wrong.
The Boy Friends That Aren’t ‘Boyfriends’
Yes, it’s true, in 2017 the male and female species can be friends without it being romantic *shock horror*. Caolán is my best friend, and my boyfriend all in one. However, I do have other friends from school and my old job that I regard as some of my closest friends because I know I can trust them 100%.
Can you think of your 5 true friends? Be honest. Who could you trust with your deepest, darkest secrets? It’s more difficult than you think. I’m not saying end all friendships because you can’t trust every single person you call a friend. I’m simply pointing out the types of friends you will come across in adult-life – I sound like a 60 year old woman, apologies.